Wednesday, June 25, 2008

A Little About the Heartland

Ahh, the Heartland; the land of my parents and theirs'. The land of tornadoes, floods, heat, humidity, cold, ice, blizzards, bugs, rodents and many, many acres of flat, flat land.

But on the flip side, it's also the land of corn, soybeans, wheat, oats, barley, sorghum and some really good vineyards. We have some wonderful Farmers' Markets, but if you want fresh fish you're out of luck; unless you hanker for catfish or crappie pulled from muddy waterways.

We have many great cooks and chefs; hence our propensity towards obesity in this region. Big, thick pork chops; beef steaks large enough to cover an entire plate; chicken prepared a zillion different ways, but the locals prefer it fried; wild mushrooms/morrels, dipped in egg wash, dredged in cracker crumbs and fried in butter; fried catfish; fried okra; fried anything; jello mixed with cottage cheese, Cool Whip, fruit or whatever's handy; fruit, cherry, blueberry, black raspberry, pear, peach, strawberry, rhubarb; cream pies.....banana, coconut, butterscotch, chocolate, french silk; puddings.....tapioca, Creme Brulee, custard; homemade ice cream. And don't forget the pastries; bread, dutch letters, Kringla, cinnamon rolls, pecan rolls, donuts, fritters, brownies........and on and on it goes. About gives a person heartburn from just reading about it, huh?

If you want to get a glazed look from a neighbor, mention the possibility of having a brunch of baked brie on rye rounds or French baguette slices with grapes or fresh strawberries. They give you that, "Is she nuts?" scarcely trying to be tolerant look. But if you want to win their hearts, invite them to an artery clogging 'all you can eat' buffet; they'll do anything for you, (after they sleep it off).

So these are my cogitations about the Heartland. Love it or hate it, but you can't ignore it. This is where all the rich, black soil is that probably grows much of what you eat.


Becky said...

yay! new blog! looks good!

Sojourner said...

Thanks, Breck! When are you going to make the switch?